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Counting their blessings
Man, 77, and wife, 53, are waiting patiently to adopt their fifth child
By PETER WILLIAMS
Managing Editor
Fred Dudley, 77, and his wife Mary, 53, are doing something that people half their ages have to think about twice.
The Dudleys are adopting children. They have adopted four youngsters — three siblings and an unrelated girl — during the past four years. If all goes well, they will adopt a fifth child, an 11-year-old foster child they are caring for at the present time. The oldest of the related children is 17; and the other two children, who are twins, are 13. The girl turns 3 next month.
For Fred Dudley, his decision to adopt goes back to a dream.
“I dreamed one night and got up and told my wife about 6:30 in the morning; I told her ‘they are going to bring a baby boy today.’
“Later, they called and asked if they could bring a baby boy by — a 1-month-old. We kept that baby ... until 6-months-old, and they gave him to somebody else. It takes a lot out of you. It was like we’d lost something.”
Mary remembers the dream, too.
“He got up and said ‘Mary, I saw in a dream that they are going to bring us a baby boy.’ I was really down on my knees praying that morning, and as soon as I rose from my knees, I got the call. They were asking me if we could take care of a baby boy.
“He (Fred) would sit in that rocking chair and he’d hold that baby every single day. It took a lot out of us when they gave him to somebody else. He’s with another nice family.”
Fred Dudley was born in Chocowinity, but he made a living as a carpenter in New York until he retired in the 1990s. In 1995, he returned to his hometown.
Each of the Dudleys were parents before they married 13 years ago. He fathered eight children, ranging in ages from 34 to 57. She had four children. Their ages range from 23 to 32.
The couple found their five-bedroom, two-bath house was “empty” without the sound of children, so they went from being temporary foster parents to adopting children.
The Beaufort County Department of Social Services used to have an age limit for people wanting to adopt children, but it has been eliminated, according to Catherine Keech, a Department of Social Services coordinator.
“We didn’t have any idea when we got into fostering that we would adopt,” Mary Dudley said. “But you know when you have them for so long and then have to let them go, they are like your children. We would lose a lot of sleep wondering what those children were doing.”
Monquie was 13-years-old when she came to live with the Dudleys, and her twin sisters, Euneeka and Eureeka, were 9.
“The biggest challenge with adopting is just knowing that you’re going to be there for the children for the rest of their lives,” Mary Dudley said. “I want to add that with me, we didn’t know we’d adopt, but it seemed like there was a void, and we just wanted to reach out and do something for the children.”
For Mary Dudley, the adopted children literally ease the pain of her chronic muscle fatigue.
“I have fibromyalgia, and every time I think about it and start to worry about the pain that I go through, I put my focus on the children and it takes all the pain away. All I can think of is ‘I’ve got to take care of these kids.’ That’s what I think, and I can’t worry about my pain.
“It’s God’s gift to be able to be with these kids.”
“The way I look at it, I’ve got five girls in the house,” Fred Dudley said. “When I think about it, the Lord has blessed me with all these beautiful children. Each one of them is God’s blessing.”
By PETER WILLIAMS
Managing Editor
Fred Dudley, 77, and his wife Mary, 53, are doing something that people half their ages have to think about twice.
The Dudleys are adopting children. They have adopted four youngsters — three siblings and an unrelated girl — during the past four years. If all goes well, they will adopt a fifth child, an 11-year-old foster child they are caring for at the present time. The oldest of the related children is 17; and the other two children, who are twins, are 13. The girl turns 3 next month.
For Fred Dudley, his decision to adopt goes back to a dream.
“I dreamed one night and got up and told my wife about 6:30 in the morning; I told her ‘they are going to bring a baby boy today.’
“Later, they called and asked if they could bring a baby boy by — a 1-month-old. We kept that baby ... until 6-months-old, and they gave him to somebody else. It takes a lot out of you. It was like we’d lost something.”
Mary remembers the dream, too.
“He got up and said ‘Mary, I saw in a dream that they are going to bring us a baby boy.’ I was really down on my knees praying that morning, and as soon as I rose from my knees, I got the call. They were asking me if we could take care of a baby boy.
“He (Fred) would sit in that rocking chair and he’d hold that baby every single day. It took a lot out of us when they gave him to somebody else. He’s with another nice family.”
Fred Dudley was born in Chocowinity, but he made a living as a carpenter in New York until he retired in the 1990s. In 1995, he returned to his hometown.
Each of the Dudleys were parents before they married 13 years ago. He fathered eight children, ranging in ages from 34 to 57. She had four children. Their ages range from 23 to 32.
The couple found their five-bedroom, two-bath house was “empty” without the sound of children, so they went from being temporary foster parents to adopting children.
The Beaufort County Department of Social Services used to have an age limit for people wanting to adopt children, but it has been eliminated, according to Catherine Keech, a Department of Social Services coordinator.
“We didn’t have any idea when we got into fostering that we would adopt,” Mary Dudley said. “But you know when you have them for so long and then have to let them go, they are like your children. We would lose a lot of sleep wondering what those children were doing.”
Monquie was 13-years-old when she came to live with the Dudleys, and her twin sisters, Euneeka and Eureeka, were 9.
“The biggest challenge with adopting is just knowing that you’re going to be there for the children for the rest of their lives,” Mary Dudley said. “I want to add that with me, we didn’t know we’d adopt, but it seemed like there was a void, and we just wanted to reach out and do something for the children.”
For Mary Dudley, the adopted children literally ease the pain of her chronic muscle fatigue.
“I have fibromyalgia, and every time I think about it and start to worry about the pain that I go through, I put my focus on the children and it takes all the pain away. All I can think of is ‘I’ve got to take care of these kids.’ That’s what I think, and I can’t worry about my pain.
“It’s God’s gift to be able to be with these kids.”
“The way I look at it, I’ve got five girls in the house,” Fred Dudley said. “When I think about it, the Lord has blessed me with all these beautiful children. Each one of them is God’s blessing.”
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tunne rat wrote on Jul 6, 2009 8:55 PM:
that is the biggest propganda word that every came out of butterfields and rino jones mouth in the past hundred years .
just 2 water boys for the obama socalist party , and a hand full of red necks that dont have a clue about whast they are talking about . "